Somewhere, surely, there must be people who hold the executive power to decide what should be put in the sandwiches that are put into packets for sale at sandwich counters, and it seems to me that these individuals are on a lifelong quest to make all sandwiches everywhere what they would consider to be as interesting as possible.
I don't consider myself to be a fussy eater, I will generally eat most things, but some of the sandwich filling combinations that these people come up really leave me questioning that idea. As I see it the more different ingredients that go into a sandwich, the greater the chance that one of those ingredients will make the whole sandwich a non-starter, by being something I'm not particularly keen on, or something I don't believe should be in a sandwich, or I feel it clashes with something else.
Do 80% of people really want a salad in their sandwich for example? Has anyone asked them?
There's always mayonnaise too. Why, why, why make the assumption that nobody wants margarine or butter on their sandwich, but everybody loves mayonnaise and lots of it?!
The result is I often find myself, stomach growling, looking at a whole shelf stacked high with sandwiches hoping against hope that I can find just one sandwich that doesn't make the corners of my mouth instinctively curl downward.
All I want is to be able to reliably be able to buy a nice simple sandwich like cheese and ham, or tuna, bacon, chicken or turkey with stuffing maybe even. Without mayonnaise. The trouble is that if the sandwichmakers' cartel do let their guard down and allow the occasional couple of simple sandwiches to sneak onto the shelves these always disappear almost instantly, the label remaining below the empty space of course to add insult to injury.
Market economics would seem to suggest that perhaps, maybe, this would be a sign that perhaps there is more demand for such "boring" sandwiches and that maybe they should make more of these, and fewer of the other type, which go on to form the unclaimed hoards, remaining to be eyed with suspicion by hungry passers by.
Unfortunately this isn't the case. As far as I am able to tell, to the unpopularity of their more interesting sandwiches can only be interpreted by these people as a signal that they aren't trying hard enough, and they'd better redouble their efforts next time around. This then becomes an endless feedback loop which will go on forever.
If it wasn't for the time spent travelling I swear it would be worth the price of a Eurostar ticket to go to France where it's possible to get a buttered baguette with cheese and ham in it. Delicious cheese and ham, and nothing else!
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